Tumblr Mouse Cursors
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Montag, 10. Oktober 2011

warum versteht mich keiner ? ..

Heute kam sie in mein zimmer. den tag werde ich nie vergessen .. 

„Mom ? was willst du hier ? „

„Zeig deine beine und deine arme sofort”

Ich hatte so angst. Hab langsam das t-shirt ausgezogen. Ich hab gehofft sie wuerde nichts merken. Doch sie merkte es.Ihre augen wurden feucht. Sie hat angefangen zu weinen. Sie sass neben mir und weinte. Stunden lang sass sie nur und weinte.

„ warum machst du das ? sag mir nur warum ..”

„ ich weiss es nicht . ich weiss es wirklich nicht. Ich will das nicht aber es wird alles langsam zu viel fuer mich. Ich schaff das nicht mehr. Ich will weg .. „

„ du zerstoerst dich selber. Ich kann nichts dagegen machen . du weisst nich wie es sich fuer eine mutter anfuehlt wenn ihr kind sich selber kaputt 
macht. Es fuehlt sich so an als ob. du mich kapputt machen wuerdest .. „

geh bitte. Lass mich allein. Bitte geh. Du weisst ganz genau warum ich es mache. Bitte geh …”

Nach 2 Stunden verliess sie mein zimmer. Nach hunderten fragen. Ich schweigte nur und guckte sie an. Hab. versucht mich abzulenken. Hab. den fernseher angemacht. Doch meine seele war so kaputt. Ich konnte sie nich weinen sehen. Ich wollte das nich. Es is nur ein hilfeschrei …

1 Kommentar:

  1. toller blog:)
    schau doch mal bei meiner blogaktion vorbei.
    würde mich sehr freuen.
    mach weiter so:))

    http://sonnenscheinstrahlen.blogspot.com/2011/10/da-es-noch-ein-bisschen-hin-ist-das-ich.html#comments

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